Edina Hall

Dear Friends in Christ,  

Today is the Feast Day of the Visitation of the Blessed Virgin Mary…and I have always had a strained relationship with the Virgin Mary.

In my 20s, I walked out of dinner (and the mile home) when my father and I disagreed as to her place among the Communion of Saints. My father, raised Anglican, held her in a special position while I felt she was just somewhere in the Communion of Saint milieu.

My feminist side bristled when my “once-Episcopalian-but-newly-converted-Catholic" friend laid a deferential bouquet at the feet of a Virgin Mary statue at her wedding. What?

I tried to meet Mary in Morning Prayer with Fr Mark, but for some reason, we couldn’t connect.

And, after starting this reflection about a month ago and preparing at least a dozen drafts, I find that I am no closer to understanding my relationship with Mary. 

I can see an admirable strong young woman who said “yes” to God, Jesus, and everything that would come with that “yes.” Perhaps I am jealous of the faith, confidence, and humility in that “yes.”

Perhaps I see her strength as unachievable when compared to my own.

Maybe I am frustrated that I don’t get angels announcing my future or afraid that I wouldn’t have even one friend who would say “blessed are you!” when called by God to an unconventional path.

Maybe I am in awe.

Perhaps I am frustrated with her fading from the bible accounts so I can’t know her better as a stronger, older, wiser woman.

In the ongoing feminist movements, where are you placed, Mary? On a pedestal or on the front lines? Why do I/we/society (religious and secular) even place you where we do?

And maybe I am just overthinking the whole thing...

... Mary, who are you to me? 

—Edina