Sherry Sterling

Dear friends,

Have you ever experienced someone being upset with you, and you didn’t know why? Maybe you discover it was a look you gave, or a tone in your voice. Or a word you used that means something different to the two of you. When this happens in my relationships, the other’s hurt feelings catch me off guard. Like hearing a needle run across a vinyl record—I suddenly discover that the impact was different than my intent. And I’m uncomfortable.

I’m realizing how I want to be known for my goodness, not judged as carelessly causing harm.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about our basic goodness. That while we make mistakes, and are not always at our best, we’re usually doing the best we can. The stories we have about Jesus show him extending grace to those who were caught in their mistakes. He loved them where they were.

In the gospel reading for today (John 21:15-22), recently resurrected Jesus asks Simon Peter three times whether he loves him, perhaps giving Peter the opportunity to be redeemed for the three times he denied Jesus on the night of his death. By the third time, Peter felt hurt. And Jesus gave him a job to carry on the loving work he began: “Feed my sheep.” Even though Peter had messed up, Jesus entrusted him with his mission.

We can’t earn our way into heaven, and we can’t be so bad so as to be excluded from God’s grace.

A priest who’s worked with gang members in LA for decades (Gregory Boyle), in his recent book The Whole Language: The Power of Extravagant Tenderness, tells how treating “homies” with tenderness shows them the essence of who they are—loved children of God. And then they can live into that truth. He sees through their bad behavior to the core of their essential goodness. Boyle said, “We don’t save homies, we see them. We don’t measure people, we meet them,” and,

“People change when they’re cherished.”

I’m pondering how I can cherish more those in my life, including myself, seeing us all through God’s eyes, “a God,” as Boyle said in an interview, “who doesn’t ask you to measure up, just to show up to your truth. Once you know that Love never stops loving, then you know that’s where the joy is.” May we all be assured of God’s love that never stops loving us.

Peace and love,

—Sherry