Fr Peter Helman

“Yours are the heavens; the earth also is yours;
You laid the foundations of the world and all that is in it.” (Psalm 89:11)


Dear friends,

The psalmist reminds me when I read his songs that the heart is made firm in grace, amid tribulations and doubt, by the desire to know and praise God.

Wonderfully, the psalmist does not shy from pouring out before the Lord his pain and grief. God, in the secret place, sees the heart and knows whereof it is made, and so what is there to hold back that has not already been fully known.

Just the other day a beloved parishioner reminded me of Psalm 13:

How long will this pain go on, Lord,
this grief I can hardly bear?
How long will anguish grip me
and agony wring my mind?
Light up my eyes with your presence;
let me feel your love in my bones.
Keep me from losing myself
in ignorance and despair.
Teach me to be patient, Lord;
teach me to be endlessly patient.
Let me trust that your love enfolds me
when my heart feels desolate and dry.
I will sing to the Lord at all times,
even from the depths of pain.
(Translation by Stephen Mitchel)

The psalmist’s final words are a marvel to me: “I will sing to the Lord at all times, even from the depths of pain.”

With all that I am, I want to trust God, don't you? I want to train my voice to praise him for all that he has done. And yet I so often find the posture of praise difficult to hold.

The psalmist is a good teacher, and God is patient. I am remembering that the praise and prayer I render God is beautiful when it speaks from the fathoms of my soul, when I offer to God my anger, my doubt, my fear, my darknesses, my loss. Even to speak to God from that place of deepest pain is the greatest act of trust. It is God praying within us.

The truest praise and the truest prayer is unfeigned. If, as the psalmist writes, “Yours [O God] are the heavens; the earth also is yours,” then my heart is also God's, and God will never turn away anyone who calls upon his Name.

Wherever we find ourselves today, amid the changes and chances of life, let us praise God and not shrink for fear from offering to God all that is within us, for he knows our hearts and whereof we are made.


Yours in Christ,
Peter+