Fr Robert Hendrickson

Dear Friends in Christ,

I cannot decide if I am more ready for Christmas or less this year. I don't mean ready as in everything feels prepared and perfect. I certainly do not feel that and, of course, this year being online, makes the sense of year-to-year routine null and void! What I mean is, am I more or less ready for some great thing to happen.

I use the word thing because I do not know whether it will be a great joy. We can't visit friends. We can't see family. We can't worship together. We can't sing or eat or laugh together. So much of what brings us joy in this holy season is muted or mediated by a screen.

So some great thing will happen and I do not know if I am ready. I suppose that is the theme of Advent. Some great thing will happen and we need to prepare somehow. This year all the kinds of preparation we did in the past is kind of out the window. Not much packing. Less cooking. Maybe less wrapping and less shopping. Certainly less Church - or at least less in-person church.

This year is different, so I am finding that I need to prepare differently. Some thing is going to come and I am trying to be ready for it. In most years that means doing everything that I can to make the experience happen. I am a notorious decorator at home, I love buying gifts, and I love to plan our services and see them come off without major hitches. I spend lots of time on each word or phrase I will use in a sermon. I think about the tempo and rhythm and rhyme of it. I want to help shape the experience for those around me - or maybe I want to be in control of the experience - who knows.

But this year I have virtually no control over it. A great thing is going to happen and I cannot manage it, predict it, nor figure out what it is going to mean. So I am trying to prepare by leaving myself open to what will happen. I can only pray and be in the present with my family as we prepare more simply and less feverishly. I can listen to the kids chat about presents under the tree rather than ignoring them as I think about the day's schedule. I can listen to the words of carols and not just scan them to see if they'd be good for the 5:00pm service.

I can look past some lights in our neighborhood to look more closely at the nativity scene they illumine.

Some great thing is going to happen this week. I do not know what it will be or what it will feel like nor how it will go. I suppose that is about as perfect a place to be while sitting on the doorstep of mystery, having knocked, and awaiting the light to come from the door God is opening again.

Yours in Christ,

Fr Robert